This the season. Just founded some new great non invasive religion.

As you all know, I have long been a passionate practicing religious scholar. I am now a Pooh-Bah of the “COCKREL” club; a very little known spiritual club which originated in Pahokee, my birth place. Every member is a Pooh-Bah. In the COCKREL kitchen, it’s all chefs Pooh-Bah, no cooks. The COCKREL members embrace a combination of all earthly and spacy religions. It is some kind of a disorganized smorgasbord of organized religions.  A COCKREL membership offers countless benefits. It beats, hands down, all other credence, as it allows room for error. With COCKREL, you can’t go wrong. You venerate all the gods in one quick sweep. No doubt, the sweep will include the right god. Without COCKREL, imagine for a second what would happen to those who picked the wrong one!

So many choices of religions and gods; and just a lifetime to decide. COCKREL, no need to choose! Embrace them all. When in doubt, COCKREL it!

The COCKREL membership is free. No meetings; no donations; no guilt; no kneeling; no smoke; no story book in funny characters; no painful self-flagellation; no mandatory trips; no molestation; no constraint; no insult to the members’ intelligence; no rosary; no fashion competition; no hypocrisy; no confession; no free food and wine; no carpet needed; no endless boring meetings; no salesmen preachers; no nonsensical stories and no practice paraphernalia.

The perfect, guaranteed path to the right heaven; or your Monopoly money back. No question asked. Heaven guaranteed and free. The best after and during life you can imagine.

NOW, HOW DID WE COME UP WITH “COCKREL”?

COCKREL ETYMOLOGY: The compression of the two words: cocktail and religions.

COCKREL RECEIPE: Throw all organized religions, credence and philosophical beliefs in a large drum. 50 gallons will do. Mix it well for approximately 10 minutes. Add a few drops of lavender oil for good measure. Strain all man-made bullshit, politics, dishonesty, hypocrisy, greed, lies and decay. Keep only the spiritualism, the respect of others, the kindness, the love of nature, the acceptance and respect of others’ ideas, the understanding, recognition and deference to people who have different views than the Cockrelians. You just have created a new batch of COCKREL.

All the problems affecting the usual religious clubs deluxe do not exist in the COCKREL club. As the Cockrelians believe in peace, kindness and tolerance. They don’t start wars, they don’t seek control, and they don’t manipulate their members. All the members are Pooh-Bahs after all.  The COCKREL club membership is totally FREE. We have no buildings, no paraphernalia, no managers or preachers or other expensive popes, rabbis, monks, priests, ayatollah, prophets or imams. You keep all that you earn, as the Cockrelians find it awkward when money is commingled with spiritualism. It always gets a funny smell!

The COCKREL spirituality is a mind process. When it comes to spiritual thoughts, Cockrelians believe that no one should derive a financial benefit when helping others with their mind process, if and when they ask.  

In our serene approach to spiritualism, we resolve our dislikes in a simple way. We don’t persecute anyone; we simply avoid and ignore certain breeds: those who sell religion; those who profit because of religion; those who control others with religion; those who threaten with religion; pretty much all those folks who acquire financial, power or material benefits from others in using any form of religion as an exploiting tool.

The Cockrelians have no spiritual or religious obligations, no calendars, no weekly meetings, no hourly prayers, no offering plate, no 10% of your income, no fantastic stories, no boring meetings, no commandments, no saints, no Sunday suit, no miracles, no guilt trips, no prayers for cash, no subtle threats (or blatant) and no lifetime obligations. The Cockrelians dismiss, avoid and ignore the wealthy religious managers of all creeds who are living the life of luxury while trying to convince you, for hefty fees, that even though your life is shitty now, the afterlife will be wonderful. Hopefully as more and more people embrace COCKRELIANISM, this breed of charlatans will likely disappear.  

COCKRELIANISM is a lifestyle whose members revere a positive and respectful attitude without the need of accessories, or leaders, but friends with whom they can exchange ideas, and who treat others in the same manner they’d expect to be treated. Wow! It feels that if all humans were Cockrelians, there wouldn’t be any need to die to go to heaven….